Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
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