WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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