we're blogging at a bar
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
The uberlube is also flammable
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
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