I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Randomize
