She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
