The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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