At least make sure they are 18
Why
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize