Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
How's work?
Spinning.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Randomize
