if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
She announced her abortion via fbk
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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