So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
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