I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
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