The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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