I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Drake has all the answers
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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