Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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