decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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