Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
