the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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