I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
so explain again why im purple
no
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
