I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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