So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
