i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize