I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
