My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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