Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Is this like a preordered booty call?
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
