Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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