my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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