I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
