Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
