I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize
