sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i dont even know how to be here
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
