rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize