whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
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