Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
