Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Randomize
