I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
