I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize
