OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
