We should be called the Road Head Warriors
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Randomize
