so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
