This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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