she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Randomize
