We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
People in love make me want to vomit
Acid is not a monday night drug
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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