I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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