Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
