next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Randomize
