We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
