ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize
