When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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