Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
But break dance skills will only take you so far
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
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