So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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